When I moved over to this blog, a friend asked why the domain is my full name when, in a year, I’ll have a new name. The answer, in short, is that I won’t. Well, not completely at least.
As a child, I was a bit embarrassed by my last name. I was called “bald” or “baldy,” which was quite ironic, considering my hair was so large it rivaled the state of Texas. I awaited the day i’d be married and have the opportunity to have a different name.
And then, slowly, I started to like it. I liked it because it has deep roots built in Italy and New York. My name has a history, a past that some text books mention, and some relatives still nervously avoid. It sounds so Italian that when booking a hotel in Italy, the concierge assumed I was native. Somehow, the name became me.
So although I’m thrilled to be accepting Samir into my life, I’ve been a bit hesitant to give it up. Thankfully, Samir is understanding and we came up with a compromise (because that’s what couples do).
Upon getting married next year, I am changing my name. I’m going to take his last name not because it’s the thing to do, but because I want to do it. I want to be his family. But, I’m not giving up my last name. While I won’t go by it anymore, I’m keeping it as my pen name. I’ve built a life around it, and more importantly, a writing resume. I don’t want to change that. Whatever I have published in the future will be under my original last name.
And I think that’s the right thing to do. It’s a way to embrace my future, but not forget my past. A memento left over from an exciting journey. A piece to remind myself of who I was whenever I forget.
5 thoughts on “A Name by Any Other Name”
Kids even called girls “baldy”? Terrible form. Only boys should be called that. Um, not that I did that. Dont look at me, I’m hideous.
We’re doing the same thing, girl. When W and I get married at the end of this month, I’ll take his last name because I want to. But professionally, I will always remain E.P.
Do y’all have a date set?
That is a good idea! That’s something I would definitely consider if I ever get married. 🙂
Excellent compromise! I had a little trouble parting with my name too.
I work in the medical field and we have to initial EVERYTHING we do. Well for the last 9 years…I’ve been LR. When I got married this year…while I changed my last name…I couldn’t bring myself to change my initials at work. After all…who the hell is LH? 🙂
I think that’s a fabulous idea! And congrats on your new blog! XOXO